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It had a trampoline in it with several beds and I asked what it was used for. Dad smiled as he showed me a video of a group of naked women jumping on the trampoline just like on the Man Show. I asked him how he got these women down here without mom knowing. He told me to look closer as I realized mom was one of the women. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Dad informed me he owned a small adult film company and mom, my aunt, Maria, and Anna had all participated in the making of adult films. Jess is the only one that has not been in one. I was totally stunned as dad showed me several stills of the women getting fucked by different porn actors. This explained the acceptance of nudity I lived around and grew up with in our household I thought to myself. Dad admitted to me that mom’s interest in doing another film had waivered since her and I started having sex, but he was hoping with my encouragement she would change her mind. He told me that with mom’s huge melons and sexy ass. I’m not sure if you can understand what it feels like not to be able to live and love fully, when you’ve been living and loving to your heart’s content all your life. A rather large part of you is suddenly gone. At work and with my friends I was still happy, but there were times when I was alone when everything seemed less shiny, less colorful somehow. It’s as close to a depression I had ever come in my life. I shook it off kind of quickly, and the only lasting result of my temporary blues was that I lost some weight, which meant that I could buy some new clothes, two sizes smaller than before. And honestly – retail therapy really does work! My new, thinner, slightly more cynical, but still infinitely romantic self continued going to work and continued meeting my closest friends every Thursday. My friends could see that I struggled somewhat with my new world order, but except for some darkly cynical thoughts from Mary’s side, some cold half-smiles from Susan and some.
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